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Ah, yes, the classic wisdom of Homer Simpson. Remember, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again… until you fail gloriously and have a good story to tell at parties!

failure, first step, humor, irony, motivation, self-deprecation, step, trying

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

1 month ago
ache, another, bowl, cream, dessert, eating, eating habits, food, food logic, habits, humor, i, ice, ice cream, indulgence, logic, me, stomach, stomach ache, sure, think
Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

1 month ago
actually, breed, bulldog, dog, french, French bulldog, humor, nationality, puerto, Puerto Rican, rican
“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

1 month ago
athlete, attempt, begin, comedy, couch, fitness, humor, i, laziness, motivation, myself, procrastination, self-motivation, third, whisper
I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

2 months ago
beauty, confidence, cute, honesty, humor, self-deprecation, ugly
Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

1 month ago
activity, comparison, drinking, humor, irony, opposite, snorkeling, straw
No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

1 month ago
anything, comfort, comfortable, humor, just, kid, mom, need, needs, parenting, sat, sudden

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

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Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

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The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

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The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Someone at work had a 25-year anniversary, and it took everything in me not to say she’s been working longer than I’ve been alive.

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Nosferatu 2024, Frankenstein 2025, and Werwulf 2026. I was born at exactly the right time.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Instead of writing LOL, I’m going to start writing SALTS (smiled a little, then stopped). It’s more accurate.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right louder.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

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Activity Log ✨

Trying is the first step toward failure.

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Did you know 17 muscles are activated when you’re crying? Fitness is my passion.

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

I’m never early… unless we’re talking about the airport.

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Much like a candle, I was tall when I was young, but I get shorter as I grow old.

Being rich is going to look so cute on me.

I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer. Plus, it’s fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

I hope this email makes you quit your job.

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Trying is the first step toward failure.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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