Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.
  • I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.
  • I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.
  • Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.
  • Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.
  • You look like something I drew with my left hand.