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Commentary:
"Ah, the magical age of 40s where 'I'm too old for this shit' becomes your catchphrase and your superpower. No longer just an excuse, but a way of life! Embrace it and watch as responsibilities magically disappear (or at least, that's the plan)."

40s, age, aging, everything, excuse, explanation, humor, laugh, life, old

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

1 month ago
aging, anything, average, confidence, consider, humor, i, myself, self-awareness, self-deprecating, well
The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

1 month ago
afterlife, alive, avoid, devil, eternity, hell, humor, irony, spending, supernatural
Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

2 months ago
blank, brag, confusion, directions, humor, i, me, meditation, mind, navigation, need, second, someone
Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

4 months ago
banking, card, decline, embarrassment, experience, finance, Funny, funny experience, humor, know, money, payment
Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

3 weeks ago
another, bed, behavior, camera, funny behavior, illness, just, level, mental, mental illness, pretend, setting, setup, woke, woke up
I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

1 month ago
abduction, alien, aliens, chores, clean, cleaning, eat, hands, humor, hygiene, i, me, mothership, parenting, room, vegetables, wash

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

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Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Texting my boss from the job I got laid off from 5 months ago and telling him I have diarrhea.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

My boyfriend always complains that I never smile, but he’s the one who wanted a serious relationship.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Oasis didn’t just write good songs. They wrote the soundtrack for a whole generation.

Live now on Telegram:

I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Going viral on Twitch:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Going bananas on Slack:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Breaking via Messenger:

I was very disappointed when I found out drinking alcohol doesn’t actually kill brain cells, I was hoping to join a political party one day.

Just shared via Messenger:

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Going viral on Slack:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

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Welcome to your 40s. “I’m too old for this shit” is now your excuse and explanation for everything.

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

I’m bad at being sad. Three mins later, I’m making jokes about my situation.

Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti.

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

The gym gives you energy, but you need energy to get to the gym. Feels like a pyramid scheme, if you ask me.

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

Headache pro-tip: Bang your toe into something.

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

You don’t know about stupidity until your female friends open up about their love life.

You’ve got to question the legitimacy of the Burger Kingdom if Burger King is just handing out crowns to anybody willy-nilly.

I only like when it rains when I’m home.

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Welcome to your 40s. “I’m too old for this shit” is now your excuse and explanation for everything.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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