Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Bowling: The most fun you can have wearing someone else’s shoes.
  • The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.
  • The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.
  • I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!
  • I always make sure the garage door is shut. Wouldn’t want hoodlums stealing the stuff I’ve been meaning to get rid of for years.
  • If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.