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I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

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Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

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I always like to remember the time before the internet. It was so good not to know how cruel and stupid humanity really is.

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The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

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If I were a mouse, I’d say things like “cheesed to meet you”.

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This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.