Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.
  • Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?
  • Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.
  • In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.
  • I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.
  • God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”