Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ด has viewed:

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ช has viewed:

You canโ€™t have everythingโ€ฆ where would you put it?”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

Sorry Iโ€™m late โ€” I was standing in the shower, thinking about stuff.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฉ has copied:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ป has viewed:

I am at my Thanksgiving table observing personality disorders that have not been identified yet.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡น has bookmarked:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

Ending my thesis paper with โ€œbut who cares what I think?โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

This entire month couldโ€™ve been an email.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I was disappointed to learn today that my request for a sabbatical was rejected. Apparently thatโ€™s โ€œnot how marriage works.โ€

Just shared via Pinterest:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Just shared via Telegram:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Making waves on Slack:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Reported on Reddit:

A social media post so confusing you turn your music down to read it.

Just shared via YouTube:

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

Broadcasted on Slack:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Just landed via Reddit:

I deserve a dragon after all Iโ€™ve been through.

Just landed via Twitch:

If I was pregnant and people asked when I was due, I would say “What do you mean?”

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?
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Commentary:
"Your talent for obscure references is unmatched! Ready for a game of 'Guess that Trivia' where no one knows the answers? ๐Ÿ˜„๐ŸŽฒ๐Ÿ” #NicheNuggets"

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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡น has viewed:

Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฏ has downloaded:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has shared:

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

Made it to Friday, but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ง has copied:

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡บ has downloaded:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ธ has downloaded:

I need money, not feelings.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ธ has bookmarked:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Shared recently on Facebook:

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they donโ€™t like dinner.

Live now on Reddit:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Person: gives compliment. Me: let me give you a brief synopsis of why you are sorely mistaken.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

You okay, babe? Youโ€™ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Trending via WhatsApp:

So rude to come up with solutions to my excuses.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I see stand-up comedy as a stepping stone to television. A few more paid gigs and Iโ€™ll be able to afford a television.

Just shared via Reddit:

That feeling when itโ€™s Friday, you blink once, and somehow itโ€™s Monday again.

Seen just now on Facebook:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Just landed via Twitch:

Welcome to adulthood: your chin looks lonely, hereโ€™s another one.

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