43 funny group quotes - Wordgag

Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

May 27, 2026

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

May 27, 2026

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

May 27, 2026

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

May 27, 2026

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

May 27, 2026

You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.

May 26, 2026

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

May 26, 2026

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

May 26, 2026

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

May 25, 2026

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

May 24, 2026

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

May 24, 2026

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

May 24, 2026

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

May 24, 2026

Can’t stop thinking about that time at the planetarium where they showed us a picture of earth and everyone booed.

May 23, 2026

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

May 23, 2026

A large group of people is called an “eww, no thank you”

May 23, 2026

There’s no-one who can get more drunk on power than the admin of a village Facebook group.

May 22, 2026

“I thought it might be nice to go around the room and have everyone introduce themselves, including a fun fact.” You thought wrong.

May 22, 2026

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

May 22, 2026

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

May 22, 2026

My therapist says he can’t take any more of my talk and that I should join a group. So, here I am.

May 22, 2026

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

May 21, 2026

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

May 21, 2026

Things I hate about group work: The group.

May 21, 2026

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

May 20, 2026

Hike in groups. Bears like to have options.

May 20, 2026

Dogs are man’s best friend because a dog would never blindside you with a group chat.

May 20, 2026

We can’t all be underemployed creatives. Someone in the group chat needs to know what an insurance is.

May 19, 2026

I’m one group chat away from vanishing into the woods to befriend forest creatures.

May 19, 2026

Get off the apps. Sleep with someone in your friend group. Add an awkward tension every time you hang out with them.

May 19, 2026

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

May 19, 2026

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

May 18, 2026

Discovering the Spice Girls broke up not over money and fame but lesbianism.

May 18, 2026

Sorry, babe, can’t right now. The group chat is active, and I’m trying to get my joke in before they change topics.

Apr 1, 2026

Having long hair as a guy is so scary because some days I look like the charming lead of a classic film from the 80s, and other days I look like a Discord mod that runs his Magic: The Gathering group like the Navy.

Apr 1, 2026

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Mar 31, 2026

I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

Mar 31, 2026

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

Mar 31, 2026

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Mar 31, 2026

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Mar 31, 2026