Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I wish my midlife crisis made me want to get a gym membership and a revenge body, but instead I’m eating Snickers for breakfast in bed.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.