A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I was not made for a 9 to 5; I was made to eat pasta and lay in the sun like a lizard.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Can’t, too busy deleting screenshots of my lock screen.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Due to unfortunate circumstances, things are no longer fergalicious nor bootylicious.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Googled my symptoms and it turns out it’s just the politics.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.