Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away…unless the doctor is cute! 🍎😍 Who needs fruit when you have a charming physician checking up on you? 😉 #HealthyCrush"

apple, cute, day, doctor, forget, fruit, health, humor, joke, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

0

2 months ago

call, calls, cell, cell phone, humor, i, interaction, just, phone, procrastination, ringing, social, social interaction, sometimes, stop, stop ringing, tell, wait, watch
Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

0

2 months ago

amok, caffeine, coffee, humor, sleep, wakefulness
A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

0

2 months ago

communication, expression, humor, sigh, speak, woman, words
Some of you need to clean your room before you take a selfie.

0

2 months ago

advice, before, clean, cleanliness, humor, media, need, personal, personal space, room, selfie, social, social media, space, take
Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

0

3 weeks ago

activity, cause, enough, frustration, hard, humor, irony, mental, mental activity, never, over, overthinking, think, thinking
Women always want to marry intelligent men. What they don’t know: Intelligent men don’t want to marry.

0

2 months ago

always, dating, expectations, humor, intelligent, intelligent man, irony, know, love, man, marry, men, relationship, want, women

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

15 shares on WeChat this month:

I need a break from me.

25 shares on Reddit this month:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

38 shares on X this month:

Just got sacked from my job at a think tank for thinking about donuts.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

66 shares on TikTok this month:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

77 shares on Instagram this month:

You’ve got to question the legitimacy of the Burger Kingdom if Burger King is just handing out crowns to anybody willy-nilly.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

25 shares on YouTube this month:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Please text me back. I’m about to start making stuff up in my head, and the stuff is all bad.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I apologize to my future son for the delay, but it’s just your mom ain’t replying.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

It should be socially acceptable to just face the wall at a party when you need a break from talking.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Just a reminder that with Die Hard, Robin Hood and Love Actually, ‘Alan Rickman ruins Christmas’ is a whole movie subgenre.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Ironic that the two ơ’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

Spotted on TikTok:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Broadcasted on X:

If you get bitten by a snake and you’re not sure if it was poisonous, simply wait to see if you die or not. That should give you your answer.

Seen just now on Facebook:

People who lie all the time really think that we don’t know.

Making waves on Reddit:

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Broadcasted on Discord:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I need an app that deletes my number from other people’s phones.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My favorite color is money.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

Some of you need to clean your room before you take a selfie.

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

Women always want to marry intelligent men. What they don’t know: Intelligent men don’t want to marry.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨