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Ah, the infamous "microsleep" phenomenon – a brief moment of shut-eye that stretches into a never-ending slumber, brought to you by the advanced age clock 🕰️⏰. Who needs naps when you can master the art of microsleeps? It's the ultimate power nap strategy for the seasoned snoozer! 💤😆

age, hours, humor, last, life, microsleep, rest, sleep

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

1 month ago

favorite, favorite part, food, humor, joke, rolls, season, spring
I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

2 months ago

Caribbean, chicken, Costco, food, humor, i, joke, rotisserie, rotisserie chicken, shopping, standing, sunbathing, tan
I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

1 month ago

6am, holiday, humor, irony, karma, morning, schedule, work
“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

1 month ago

alert, anticipation, humor, interaction, me, past, sneak, unexpected
Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

2 months ago

chores, cleaning, Earth, humor, kids, laundry, parenting, rocks, time
Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

1 month ago

accident, accidentally, blue, blue shirt, forklift, funny situation, job, shirt, situation, stockroom, Sue, unexpected, unexpected job, Walmart

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

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God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

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Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

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How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

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McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

“Do something with your life.” Um, I am. Have you heard of a little thing called squandering?

Making waves on Snapchat:

All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

Trending via Pinterest:

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

Just landed via X:

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

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At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Toast doesn’t talk. How do you know it’s French?

This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

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Water is a drink whose flavor is its temperature.

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Sorry, I just saw your text from last night. Are you guys still at the restaurant?

And to my grandchildren, I leave my unread PDFs.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If cats could text you back, they wouldn’t.

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

So, you’re telling me I’m just supposed to get up every day and keep living like this? Seems like a scam to me.

By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

It’s always fun listening to someone’s lie when you already know the truth.

Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

It’s funny how when you’re at work, “Go to hell” comes out as “No problem.”

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

If I say I love you, it’s just the apocalypse talking.

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At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Cleaning the rocks of the earth one load of my kids’ laundry at a time.

Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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