At my funeral, take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next.

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next.

Commentary:
“Here lies a real crowd-pleaser! 💐🎉 Who’s up for catching the bouquet and continuing this wild ride of life? 😉 #FuneralGoals”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I will not hesitate to use dark magic on you.

    Commentary:
    Eye of newt, spite of ex—let’s get petty, medieval style 🧙‍♀️🕯️📜

  • I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs a night out when you can have a thrilling adventure at the grocery store 🛒, the post office 📬, and the DMV 🚗? Life‘s a party, just with more paperwork and fewer cocktails! 🎉📝🥂”

  • If a ham is allowed to spiral then so am I.

    Commentary:
    “Life’s too short to be a regular, non-spiraling human! 🌀 Dream big, swirl around, and embrace your inner ham! 🐷🤪”

  • They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

    Commentary:
    “Who ya gonna call? 🚫👻 Imagine the Yelp reviews on that: ‘Great location, spacious rooms, but the ghost in the attic is a bit too chatty for my liking.’ 😂🏠 #HauntedHouseHunting”

  • I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.

    Commentary:
    “Here’s to the real MVP of your hand gestures – the middle finger! 🖕🏼 Always there to help you express yourself when words are not enough. Just remember to use it wisely and sparingly! 😉👌”

  • Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

    Commentary:
    “Time Magazine really missed out on a golden opportunity here! 😂 Maybe they could have a ‘Worst Person of the Year’ edition next time! 🏆🙈”