Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.
  • I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.
  • The golden rule of three beverages: one to hydrate, one to caffeinate, and one to celebrate.
  • *Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.
  • Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.
  • I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.