Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Dear nurses, please respect our dignity and save us from the 'Weight Announcement Ceremony'! 🤐😂 Let's keep that number a secret between you, me, and the scale! 😅 #StealthyWeighIn"

announce, closed, embarrassment, eyes, eyes closed, health, honesty, humor, i, just, nurse, scale, weight

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When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

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I enjoy excess, but only in moderation.

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Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

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My husband needs a hearing aid, but refuses to get one because it’s the key to our happy marriage.

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I won’t be doing Dry January, because who was there for me during the happy times and the hard times? Not broccoli.

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That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

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The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Activity Log ✨

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It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

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It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

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Them: You post a lot. What am I supposed to do here – fold laundry on the timeline?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

Shared recently on Facebook:

The sun really clocks out for the day before I do. That’s insane.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

“Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries?” Me, interrupting a couple fighting.

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They should invent a type of situation that improves.

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Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.

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Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨