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Updated: May 22, 2026

 

 

 

 

16 Funny avocado quotes

Funny avocado quotes bring a slice of humor to everyone’s favorite green fruit! 🥑😂 From playful jabs about the creamy texture to amusing anecdotes about avocado-related mishaps, these quotes highlight the lighter side of this popular superfood. Whether you’re an avocado enthusiast or just enjoy a good laugh, funny avocado quotes are sure to add a touch of fun to your day. 😄🥑

I would never be comfortable delivering a baby. I can’t even remove an avocado pit without dropping it.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

When is someone actually going to change the surprise in the avocado? This hard core is kind of a stupid toy.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

Posted onMay 18, 2026

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Posted onMar 30, 2026

I have the patience of a nearly ripe avocado.

Posted onMar 30, 2026

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Posted onMar 29, 2026

Do you ever think about how many people squeezed the avocado that you’re eating?

Posted onMar 29, 2026

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

So cool that avocados come with those little wooden balls inside, I think I have collected the whole set.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

Avocado is just green butter.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

Posted onMar 26, 2026

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Posted onMar 26, 2026

Jan 1st: Avocado on whole grain toast with a protein shake. Jan 20th: Syrup comes from a tree so technically it’s a vegetable.

Posted onMar 25, 2026

Would it kill the makers of avocados to put a different toy inside?

Posted onMar 25, 2026

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