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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing, and never letting that horse rest in peace.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

The way turkeys feel about November is probably how treadmills feel about January.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,651

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I like it when it’s raining, because I can hold my umbrella really low and it makes everyone headless.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Spotted on Slack:

I think one of my biggest hangups in getting better at Spanish is that speaking with the correct accent makes me feel racist.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

Just landed via Slack:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Just landed via Telegram:

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Making waves on Facebook:

What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

Seen just now on Threads:

Why do I gotta dress for success? Maybe success could be the one who puts a little more into this relationship.

Funny deny quotes

Funny deny quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor when saying no 🙅‍♂️🚫 Whether you want to dodge awkward questions or just keep things lighthearted, these witty lines bring laughs and clever twists 😄✨ Ready to master the art of the polite but hilarious refusal? Let’s dive into some playful ways to say nope without losing your charm! 🎉😂

New funny deny quotes 👇

All funny deny quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Discord this month:

You can fake an American accent all you want, but “literally” will expose you.

26 shares on Threads this month:

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

78 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

49 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s so cold that men who wear shorts outside in the winter are wearing TWO pairs of shorts.

14 shares on YouTube this month:

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

21 shares on X this month:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

66 shares on YouTube this month:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

12 shares on Instagram this month:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched the argument I baited you with.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Life sucks. One day you have tiramisu, and then most other days you don’t. I hate that.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,495

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

“Made with love,” means I licked the spoon and kept using it.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Sometimes I don’t have anything intelligent to say and sometimes I don’t let that stop me.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Clicking on a suspicious link at work just to feel something.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Finally gathered all my thoughts and now they’re jumping me.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I just want to be treated like a hot little French fry.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

No president next term. America needs to be single for a while to focus on herself.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Petition to make weekends longer. Two days isn’t enough.

Just landed via X:

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Going viral on Threads:

The season is back when women are 80% scarf.

Spotted on X:

I like my bacon like I like my men, slightly burnt and crispy, and probably killing me slowly.

Spotted on TikTok:

Why is incognito mode always associated with freaky shit? I use it to search up very obvious questions, so there’s no record of me looking dumb.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Can’t believe we used to throw eggs at houses, and now we can afford neither eggs nor houses.

Going viral on Reddit:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Just landed via X:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Spotted on X:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

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