46 funny alien quotes - Wordgag

Yeah, the planet is dying. The government hates us. The animals are leaving. The aliens aren’t contacting us. We might be alone. It just might be you and me.

May 30, 2026

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

May 30, 2026

Sometimes I shower in the dark and pretend I’m in a rainforest on an alien planet.

May 29, 2026

Dear algo, please only show this post to benevolent aliens.

May 29, 2026

Dissecting an alien and getting bitterly jealous at their crazy organs.

May 29, 2026

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

May 29, 2026

Aliens, robots, mutant ladybugs — whoever takes over will be better than this.

May 29, 2026

Imagine buying a new car, and some superhero throws it at an alien.

May 28, 2026

Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

May 28, 2026

Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

May 28, 2026

I always imagined WWIII would be Earth vs. aliens.

May 28, 2026

I don’t think we’ll ever see aliens. I bet that they’re just gathering information and waiting for us to destroy ourselves.

May 28, 2026

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

May 28, 2026

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

May 28, 2026

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

May 27, 2026

If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.

May 27, 2026

Due to inflation, alien abduction no longer comes with free probes. Humans are required to bring their own probes or may purchase a probe on board the spacecraft for a moderate fee.

May 27, 2026

I don’t like to call it a xenomorph — I prefer the term “the alien from Alien.”

May 26, 2026

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

May 26, 2026

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

May 25, 2026

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

May 24, 2026

Aliens traveled millions of light years to get here to visit New Jersey.

May 24, 2026

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

May 24, 2026

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

May 24, 2026

This alien invasion could have been an email.

May 24, 2026

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

May 24, 2026

Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God.

May 24, 2026

There is certainly no life on other planets. Otherwise our government would have sent money there long ago.

May 23, 2026

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

May 23, 2026

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

May 23, 2026

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

May 23, 2026

Maybe aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.

May 22, 2026

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

May 22, 2026

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

May 21, 2026

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

May 21, 2026

Aliens will always remain unidentified because they’re embarrassed to be associated with us humans.

May 21, 2026

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

May 21, 2026

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.

May 21, 2026

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

May 21, 2026

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

May 20, 2026