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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

When I was young, I was afraid of the dark. Now, these bills got me afraid of the light.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

That one person who has zero concept of what an indoor voice is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Dec 27, 2025

3,617

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Sparkling water tastes like that feeling when your foot falls asleep.

Just shared via Facebook:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Live now on LinkedIn:

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

Just landed via Messenger:

Of course, because I’m wearing a white shirt, my coffee chose violence.

Seen just now on Messenger:

If my TV’s so smart then why doesn’t it slap me when I turn on the news?

Just shared via YouTube:

Taylor Swift’s most unrealistic lyric is “he’d never tell you, but he can play guitar”, because I’ve never met a man who can play guitar that isn’t gonna tell you about it.

Home » Funny Ex Girlfriend Quotes

Funny ex girlfriend quotes

Funny ex girlfriend quotes are the perfect way to add some humor to those past relationship memories 😂💔 Whether you’re looking to laugh off the drama or share a cheeky post with friends, these witty lines will have you grinning from ear to ear 😜✨ Get ready to turn breakup blues into belly laughs and show that sometimes, the best revenge is a good joke! 🎉💬

New funny ex girlfriend quotes 👇

People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

0

2 months ago

crush, dating, ex, ex crush, ex girlfriend, girlfriend, humor, i, people, relationship
Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

0

2 months ago

breakup, commitment, dating, ex girlfriend, forever, girlfriend, humor, love, relationship, temporary

All funny ex girlfriend quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

33 shares on Telegram this month:

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

22 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

28 shares on X this month:

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My favorite machine at the gym is the one where you put change in, and snacks come out.

74 shares on Threads this month:

I need to stop living by the words “life is short.” It’s hurting my bank account.

40 shares on Discord this month:

Spell your crush’s name backwards, mine is yenom.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

76 shares on X this month:

Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.

55 shares on Slack this month:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfortunately for everyone, I will keep doing whatever I want.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not shaking hands anymore. You may bow or kneel down.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’90s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the garage.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss you (the money I spent).

14 folks are currently checking 👀

We could have high-speed rail that connects the entire country, but instead we get AI porn bots that steal all of our drinking water to entertain the dumbest people alive.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,709

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

If you ever feel stupid, just remember there are people who forgive cheating.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

“You’re so self-aware!” Thanks, it’s ruining my life.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

January 1st: anything is possible. January 2nd: but not today.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

If she says “so just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Going viral on Snapchat:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Spotted on Discord:

“I’ve had cigarettes that were better than entire years of my life.”

Live now on Snapchat:

My favorite part of leaving the house is looking forward to going home.

Seen just now on Discord:

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

Just landed via X:

Not to brag, but I just walked upstairs and remembered why.

Trending via Slack:

Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

Just shared via Telegram:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Just shared via Discord:

Bob is my nickname. Robert is my nicholasname.

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