52 funny ghost quotes - Page 2 - Wordgag

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Mar 26, 2026

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Mar 26, 2026

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Mar 26, 2026

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

Mar 26, 2026

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Mar 26, 2026

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.

Mar 26, 2026

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Mar 25, 2026

Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.

Mar 25, 2026

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

Mar 25, 2026

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Mar 25, 2026

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Mar 25, 2026

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Mar 25, 2026