Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Do the people who make chairs know what humans look like, or nah?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

How come all the single people don’t need no one, and all the married ones need two?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Nicknamed my iPhone Lois Lane because it doesn’t recognize me without my glasses on either.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

You come from dust and you will return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

For a girl that loves sleep and hates stress, my career choice is questionable.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

62 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,331

Funny Quotes Topics

17,450

Funny Quotes Images

15,331

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,285

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

It’s weird how the UFO’s always seem to crash in places that only the government and military have access to.

Just shared via TikTok:

Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

Live now on X:

Women always want to marry intelligent men. What they don’t know: Intelligent men don’t want to marry.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

Shared recently on Slack:

She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations.

Making waves on Reddit:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

Seen just now on WeChat:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

Spotted on TikTok:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

Making waves on X:

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

Funny household chores quotes

Funny household chores quotes bring laughter to the everyday grind of cleaning, cooking, and tidying up 🧹😂 Whether you’re battling laundry mountains or dodging dust bunnies, these witty sayings turn chores into chuckles 🧺✨ Perfect for brightening your day and making chores feel a little less like work and a lot more like fun! 🧽🎉 #ChoreLife #CleanAndLaugh

New funny household chores quotes 👇

All funny household chores quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on WeChat this month:

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

76 shares on Threads this month:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

59 shares on X this month:

I love that my dog always comes home from the groomer wearing a bandana. It’s like he was only gone for three hours, but joined a gang in that time.

76 shares on Slack this month:

If you go by “Toni,” I always think your full name is Rigatoni.

12 shares on WeChat this month:

At the gym, everyone thinks exclusively about how little weight I can lift and how quickly I’m out of breath, because the world revolves around me.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Men be like, yes, I hurt you, but now you hate me, so I am the true victim.

41 shares on Slack this month:

People delete their social media and start acting like they got a master’s degree in maturity.

32 shares on X this month:

Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Today’s toddlers can switch on laptops and use apps. When I was little, I ate sand.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I slept like a baby, knowing I’m a burden to everyone around me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Coffee is just goth water.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

62 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,331

Funny Quotes Topics

17,450

Funny Quotes Images

15,331

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,714

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I wonder how many people think, “What the hell?” after talking to me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

When I was a little kid, I used to think, “This little pig went to market,” meant it was going shopping!

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Trending via X:

My favorite childhood memory is having energy.

Trending via YouTube:

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m ready for the exciting last 30 seconds of the basketball game, which stretch into 25 minutes of fouls, time-outs, and commercials.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

Trending via Twitch:

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Adulthood is wild. One day I’m transferring money to my savings account, and three days later, I’m transferring it out to save myself.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴