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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Men absolutely love buying the same shirt in four almost identical colors and saying, ‘Yep, that’ll do me for the next three years.’

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

It’s so beautiful when two real perverts find each other.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

As I get older, I’m understanding why everything needs to be done before 12 p.m.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Guy on the day of the 1918 armistice, walking around the trench, clapping, saying things like “Great work, everyone,” and “We did it, team.”

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I’m implementing a new policy in my house: any child who is awake past bedtime can either go to sleep or clean the house, no exceptions.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,338

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Picking up the hem of my baggy pants to walk up the stairs like it’s a ballgown.

Just landed via YouTube:

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

Going viral on Slack:

You’re way hotter in your forties and fifties than in your twenties. The glow up is in the grow up.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Live now on Slack:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I love replying “Need him” when someone posts their boyfriend on their Instagram story.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

Shared recently on YouTube:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Funny internet browsing quotes

New funny internet browsing quotes 👇

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

21 hours ago

academic, academic paper, after, browsing, closed, ever, frustration, great, humor, internet, internet browsing, life, multitasking, paper, productivity, sex, student, student life, sure, tabs

All funny internet browsing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

69 shares on Slack this month:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

97 shares on Threads this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I didn’t want to go to work tomorrow morning.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

19 shares on Slack this month:

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

66 shares on YouTube this month:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

The sound of a buzzing fly is enough to ruin my whole mood.

73 shares on Discord this month:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

“It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I love mirrors because they remind me of how pretty I am.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Spotted on Threads:

Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

Just shared via Pinterest:

First World War. Kind of nervous.

Live now on Instagram:

I commented to a friend that I didn’t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Seen just now on Telegram:

“It is what it is,” I say, as I almost vomit from anxiety.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Making waves on Slack:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Going bananas on Threads:

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

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Activity Log ✨

Funny internet browsing quotes

New funny internet browsing quotes 👇

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

All funny internet browsing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨