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Looks like my life just hit the two-ply speed zone! 🚽🧻😂
34 Funny paper quotes
I love when people say, “In college, I wrote a paper on…” as if that holds any academic merit.
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Ah yes, my thesis on napping techniques during lectures really changed the world! 😂🎓📚
Viewing everyone’s stories like the morning paper.
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Keeping up with today's hot gossip headlines, one hilarious story at a time! 📰😂
Y’all shivering in this cold cause them Shein jackets made outta paper towels.
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When you realize your jacket can't handle a light breeze, let alone winter ❄️🧥😂
Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?
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Sex is fun, but nothing beats the thrill of slamming your laptop shut after conquering tab city 🎉📚💻
Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.
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I totally relate—my dishwasher's been on strike since it realized I like tacos more than its hard work! 🌮😂📄
What would boomers do without their paper shredder?
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They'd probably start a shredding playlist of power ballads from the 80s! 🎸🗑️🎶
Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.
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I aspire to reach the tax bracket where I don't have to worry about my paper towel usage 😂🧻💸
Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?
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"Finally, a workout plan that includes sweeping the kitchen floor! 💪🧹😅"
Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”
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When you're on the throne but forgot your crown 👑🚽🤣