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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Calling someone a “tough cookie” is not a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

If someone asks why you’re so pale, simply reply, completely shocked, “You can see me?”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I’m at the age where I understand that paying a little extra for convenience and comfort is absolutely okay.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,500

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Imagine hating me, and I’m not even paying attention.

Just landed via Twitch:

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Going viral on Twitch:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

Just landed via TikTok:

Carrying a baby for nine months and then naming it Chet is insane.

Just shared via Telegram:

I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

Just shared via Facebook:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I could be a morning person, if morning was sometime around noon.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Funny priest quotes

Funny priest quotes bring a heavenly dose of humor to your day 😇😂 Whether it’s cheeky sermons, witty wisdom, or playful parish moments, these laughs remind us that even clergy can keep things light and lively ✨🙏 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and share some divine comedy that’s perfect for lifting spirits and sparking joy across your feed! 😄📿 #HolyHumor

New funny priest quotes 👇

All funny priest quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Slack this month:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

99 shares on WeChat this month:

People watching you so close, you’d think you were a Netflix series.

93 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

100 shares on Slack this month:

Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

19 shares on Instagram this month:

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Adults chasing the popularity they missed out on as teenagers are the worst.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

55 shares on Facebook this month:

I just need to lie down for a couple of years.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

That moment the doorbell rings and you tip toe to the window pretending you’re not home.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Learn from the mistakes of others, you can never live long enough to make them all yourself.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I am simply too intelligent to be happy.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My bra isn’t just padded — it’s also filled with cookie and chip crumbs.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The goal is to make your therapist cry.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I once quit a job, and when my boss asked why, I simply said, “I hate it here.” Best day of my life.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Not being able to teleport is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,714

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Am simultaneously the family’s black sheep and gold star, and that’s exactly why I’m the way I am.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Sex is like my hair. I didn’t have any yesterday. I didn’t have any today. And unless something drastically changes, I won’t have any tomorrow.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Accidentally said I was on a diet instead of in a calorie deficit, and now everyone knows I’m from the 1900s.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Just say, “My future husband would never do that,” and move on.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

There’s no sadder tableau in all of humanity than the smoker’s terrarium at the airport.

Going viral on Facebook:

Sometimes I don’t worry about things at all and other times I am awake.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Porn looks so funny when you’re not horny.

Breaking via Messenger:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Just landed via Reddit:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Trending via Telegram:

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

Going bananas on Slack:

She’s got style, she’s got grace, she crams french fries in her face.

Spotted on Discord:

We were supposed to have flying cars and other cool stuff, but instead we have AI videos showing Michael Jackson eat at McDonald’s.

Spotted on Reddit:

Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.

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