14 Funny remark quotes

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Ugh, but profoundly.

  Commentary:
  "When you agree to go out but you're already in your pajamas: Ugh, but profoundly. 🙄😂🛌"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

  Commentary:
  "More like the Count of Clumsy! 🎶🕺🤪"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

  Commentary:
  ☕️☀️ "Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning. ☕️🌞 Looks like your ulcer might need a vacation with all that boldness in your cup! 🏝️😄"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: When life gives you lemons maybe think to yourself, “that’s really quite remarkable given how far I live from a climate capable of growing citrus.”

  Commentary:
  Well, when life gives you lemons in the middle of a snowstorm, it's either a miracle or your neighbor has a secret greenhouse full of surprises! Remember, when life throws you a curveball, just make sure it's a lemon and not a snowball.

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

  Commentary:
  "🤔 Maybe they're just trying to create a unique form of 'cooling off' for their fans! 😂💨 Who needs AC when you've got OnlyFans, right?"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, well, looks like someone's tempting fate by defying the ancient umbrella-expert advice! ☂️ Now, I'm not saying opening an umbrella indoors causes chaos, but hey, better safe than sorry… Maybe you should start looking for four-leaf clovers just in case! 🍀

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

  Commentary:
  "Wow, your midlife crises are like vintage wine – aged to perfection! 🍷 Cheers to experience and maturity, with a side of existential dread. 😅 #LifeGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

  Commentary:
  "Starting conversations with short people by saying 'back when I was your height…' is the quickest way to have them look up to you both figuratively and literally. 🙃 It's all fun and games until they challenge you to a height competition! 📏 #ShortandSweet"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: “I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone takes their pool game very seriously! 🎱 Who needs a lucky charm when you've got a favorite hole, right? 😄 Keep sinking those balls like a pro!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like this handyman isn't auditioning for a role in the customer's DIY reality show! 🎥😂 Remember folks, he's here to fix, not to entertain! 🔧💡"

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