Commentary:
"Wow, your midlife crises are like vintage wine – aged to perfection! 🍷 Cheers to experience and maturity, with a side of existential dread. 😅 #LifeGoals"
19 Funny remark quotes
Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”
Commentary:
"Starting conversations with short people by saying 'back when I was your height…' is the quickest way to have them look up to you both figuratively and literally. 🙃 It's all fun and games until they challenge you to a height competition! 📏 #ShortandSweet"
“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.
Commentary:
"Looks like someone takes their pool game very seriously! 🎱 Who needs a lucky charm when you've got a favorite hole, right? 😄 Keep sinking those balls like a pro!"
Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.
Commentary:
"Looks like this handyman isn't auditioning for a role in the customer's DIY reality show! 🎥😂 Remember folks, he's here to fix, not to entertain! 🔧💡"
No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.
Commentary:
"Sorry, I have a strict 'no ghost chat' policy 🚫👻 Who has time for spirits when dealing with the drama of the living? 😂 #GhostDialIgnore"
Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?
Commentary:
"Oh, I see the struggle of finding the perfect companion continues 😜🕰️ Maybe they're lost in a time warp or hiding in a parallel universe! Keep searching, you never know where your 'missing piece' might be hiding! 🌌🔍"
When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying ‘Haven’t decided yet’ is typically a good response.
Commentary:
🕶️💼 Feeling chic and mysterious? Rocking all black attire can make a bold statement! Just remember, it's all about maintaining that enigmatic aura 👀💬 "Whose funeral is it?" Oh, just keeping my options open… 😂 #FashionablyUndecided #AllBlackEverything
You wish you had this many chins.
Commentary:
"Who needs a double chin when you can have a whole chorus line of them? 🎶 Chin chin, hooray! 🎉 #ChinsForDays"
I liked the version of you from the other dimension better.
Commentary:
Interdimensional upgrades are always better! 🌌👀✨