Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

My husband and I are doing a workshop. He works and I’ll shop.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,740

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Legend says that when you’re overwhelmed and on the edge of a nervous breakdown, a small child will appear and tell you that you made their sandwich wrong.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Nearly choked on a carrot. A donut would never do that to me.

Live now on TikTok:

If the USA is so great, why did someone make the USB?

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Going viral on Facebook:

The best piece of dating advice I’ve ever received is “If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.” Honestly, it’s all you need to know.

Spotted on Threads:

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

Trending via Twitch:

So many songs that tell you to throw your hands in the air like you just don’t care, so few about the hazards of ceiling fans.

Funny skate quotes

New funny skate quotes 👇

I let people skate. I never mention the ice is thin.

6 hours ago

humor, i, ice, joke, let, mention, never, people, prank, sarcasm, skate, skating, thin, thin ice, warning
Heelys don’t have brakes because my swag rides forever.

2 weeks ago

confidence, forever, fun, Heelys, humor, ride, skate, swag

All funny skate quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Twitch this month:

You’d think someone in the room would’ve spoken up like “hey guys, maybe it’s a bad idea to make one ring to rule them all”.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

48 shares on Messenger this month:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

76 shares on Discord this month:

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

56 shares on Discord this month:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

Excited for my husband to get back from his trip, so I can sit him down for a little presentation of all the internet videos I saved for him to watch.

95 shares on Reddit this month:

I want time to watch more films, but I also want time to read more books, but I also want time to look at more nothing.

49 shares on YouTube this month:

AI is trained on what we write, so if we want to save our jobs we should all write really badly for a while. I’ve been doing my bit for years.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying ‘Haven’t decided yet’ is typically a good response.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Reddit:

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

“What do you do for a living?” I do my best.

Shared recently on Instagram:

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

Going viral on X:

Some people avoid bacon for the sake of religion. I avoid religion for the sake of bacon.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Your soulmate wouldn’t do you like that, by the way.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Making waves on Snapchat:

“Where did all your money go?” I’m either wearing it or eating it.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

You don’t see guys traveling around on those seesaw-type push carts on railroad tracks anymore.

Just shared via Twitch:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Live now on Discord:

Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all day if you’re constantly holding a coffee cup?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny skate quotes

New funny skate quotes 👇

I let people skate. I never mention the ice is thin.

Heelys don’t have brakes because my swag rides forever.

All funny skate quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨