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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

I need a six-month vacation twice a year.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Before you call me an idiot consider this: I know!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

The difference between a songbird and a hummingbird is that one of them knows the lyrics.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Breaking via TikTok:

Zombies started running in movies and life has been chaotic since.

Going viral on Facebook:

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

Seen just now on Facebook:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

Reported on Slack:

Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something?

Shared recently on Discord:

Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

Spotted on TikTok:

McDonald’s will “anything else” you to death. Can you wait a McMinute?

Going viral on X:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Sleeping in in winter is really great, you still have about an hour of daylight left before it gets dark again.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Part of getting older is having a favorite pen.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I always take responsibility for my actions when there is no one else around to blame.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

When I get the vibe from someone that fitting in is super important to them my first instinct is to bite them.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Twitch:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

Making waves on Telegram:

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Breaking via TikTok:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Going viral on WeChat:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Making waves on Slack:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

Just landed via Messenger:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

Just shared via Threads:

People who listen to their sad playlist when they’re happy are a different breed of unstable.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.

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