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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Aliens traveled millions of light years to get here to visit New Jersey.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Due to not wanting to, I will not be.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Girls are happier when their dress has pockets, it’s science.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Calling a lobotomy a “lobobo” to fit in with Gen Z.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I asked my dad what his favorite joke was. He said, “I can’t pick a favorite. I love you and your sister equally!”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2321 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,483

Funny Quotes Topics

15,188

Funny Quotes Images

12,483

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

I want someone to care for me as much as Netflix cares if someone has logged into my account from another device.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Please don’t interrupt me when I’m trying to overhear something.

Making waves on Discord:

I’m an adult, that’s why I can have Skittles for dinner.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I know it’s bad, and you’ve got to shut it down right away, but is there anything more hilarious than a swearing toddler?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Reported on Messenger:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Live now on LinkedIn:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Seen just now on Threads:

Like, who are those little paper umbrellas trying to protect?

Seen just now on Threads:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

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Funny thirstiest quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2321 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,483

Funny Quotes Topics

15,188

Funny Quotes Images

12,483

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,460

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I want to be rich enough where I’m not offended by the price of beef jerky.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

If you can’t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

Going viral on Twitch:

80 years from now, this comment section will be full of dead people. Write anything you want.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Meteorologist: It’s going to get even hotter. Me, on fire: WHAT?

Just shared via WhatsApp:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

Just landed via Telegram:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Spotted on Discord:

The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

There’s not gonna be a civil war. None of us can afford to take that much time off work.

Just shared via Reddit:

I might not put the sparkle in your eyes, but I’ll definitely put the “WTF” wrinkles in your forehead.

Making waves on Messenger:

The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

Seen just now on X:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

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