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3 months ago
Share →: Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, living within your means is so last season 💁‍♀️ Who needs a budget when you have an imagination bursting with creative ways to spend money you don't have? 💸✨ Someone pass the glitter, we're about to DIY our way to financial freedom! 🌈✂️ #ImaginationsUnite"
3 months ago
Share →: I’m addicted to placebos.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic case of mind over matter happening here! 💊😄 Who needs the real deal when you can get your fix from good ol' placebos, am I right? It's all about that placebo effect magic! ✨🧠 #PlaceboPower
3 months ago
Share →: My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.

Commentary:
"Oh, the eternal struggle of toeing the fine line between sarcasm and sincerity – a true conundrum! 🤔😂 It's like a never-ending game of 'Is it sarcasm or is it real life?' 🙃 Embrace the ambiguity and just keep 'em guessing! 😉 #MasterOfSarcasm"
3 months ago
Share →: I end all my sentences with “Just saying..” because ending them with “You bonehead..” would probably be considered offensive.

Commentary:
"Careful with those sentence endings! 🙊 It's all fun and games until someone gets called a bonehead. Just saying.. 😉"
3 months ago
Share →: I would go out of my mind, but I can’t find the exit.

Commentary:
"Looks like the mind is a maze with no escape route in sight! 🧠🚫🆘 Maybe a mental GPS could come in handy here! 😆🗺️"
3 months ago
Share →: It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Commentary:
"I wasn't naked, I was just rocking out to some tunes! 🎶📻 Who needs clothes when you've got music, right? 😂 #RadioIsLife"
3 months ago
Share →: Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Commentary:
“If going to Heaven means dealing with unpredictable weather but going to Hell means having a lively group of friends, I guess I’ll just bring an umbrella and sunscreen to Hell and make the most of it!”
3 months ago
Share →: If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.

Commentary:
"Remember, as much as it's important to keep an open mind, be sure to hold onto your brains too. We wouldn't want them rolling away now, would we?"
3 months ago
Share →: I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Commentary:
Well, that quote sure gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "nervous wreck"! Looks like someone doesn't just have nerves of steel, they are pure nerves! Talk about being in touch with your feelings – every nerve of them, to be exact!
3 months ago
Share →: I’m not athletic, but I’m good at jumping to conclusions.

Commentary:
"I may not be winning any marathons, but I excel at the mental gymnastics of leaping to conclusions! Watch out, I've got gold medal potential in the sport of assumption!"