Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.
  • At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.
  • The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.
  • I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.
  • Turning to the person next to me and saying “thanks for nothing” as I get off the train.
  • It’s that time of year where every jacket you choose is wrong.