Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.
  • Facial recognition technology, but for me when I’m talking to people I’ve apparently met before.
  • Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.
  • My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
  • If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.
  • I was very disappointed when I found out drinking alcohol doesn’t actually kill brain cells, I was hoping to join a political party one day.