Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I don’t always have time to fold laundry, but when I do, I don’t.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.