Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

In my retweeting era, because I’m just speechless.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,354

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Trending via X:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Just landed via YouTube:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Going viral on TikTok:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Making waves on TikTok:

As it turns out, the only way to avoid work stress is not going.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

Broadcasted on Discord:

The word “ugly” cannot be used on women, I’m sorry. Women just can’t be ugly, that’s a boy thing.

Just shared via Instagram:

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Funny quote about surprising self-discovery after slicing a donut in half.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like someone underestimated the power of a donut! 🍩💥 Who knew something so innocent-looking could reveal a whole new side of you? 😂 Just remember, donut judge yourself too harshly!

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

58 shares on Threads this month:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

60 shares on Facebook this month:

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

46 shares on X this month:

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

95 shares on Threads this month:

iPad PR is so crazy because you think you absolutely need one until you get it.

96 shares on YouTube this month:

If pigeons could talk, they would bum a cigarette.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Might mess around and reply, “That sounds like a you problem,” to every work email today.

54 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

62 shares on WeChat this month:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not fragile like a flower. I’m fragile like a bomb.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

They say half the battle of getting in shape is mental, so I thought about the gym really hard today.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

This is your sign to cancel all work meetings today.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

So cool that avocados come with those little wooden balls inside, I think I have collected the whole set.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Mario Kart turned out to be the best training for winter driving.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a huge fan of saying “You’re welcome” really loudly when people don’t say thank you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,627

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Got an email from my bank saying “is your 401k enough to retire on” and it’s like you are my bank, you know it’s not.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

If you’re late for work, don’t forget to look mad when you walk in.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I honestly have no idea what a vitamin is. It’s in a banana but it’s also the sun? Sure.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I’ll pause a YouTube video to scroll on reels. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to be loved genuinely.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

In a parallel universe, there’s a happy me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I just want to be rich enough to stop having to pretend that I’m getting work done.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

The devil couldn’t reach me, so he made sure that the love I give is never reciprocated.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

Breaking via Discord:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Just shared via WeChat:

I keep saying, “It is what it is,” but what even is it?

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Called in, “If we’re living in a simulation, just simulate that I’m in the office today.”

Seen just now on Pinterest:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Trending via Instagram:

When I’m in a good mood, I go to my blocked list and release one or two prisoners.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

Just shared via Discord:

150 years ago, you could just fake your death and go overseas and live a completely different life if you didn’t like the way the cards were originally dealt.

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