Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.
  • Why a bug would spend such a long fraction of its short life immobile on my ceiling beats me.
  • According to my kids’ Christmas lists, they think this parenting gig pays pretty well.
  • “The engine light is on!” Yeah, that means it’s working.
  • People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.
  • Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.