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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I’m willing to do anything for a job except write a cover letter.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes I wish I understood what some of you said and sometimes I am happy that I don’t.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

32 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

Just landed via Twitch:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

Just shared via Threads:

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Trending via X:

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Shared recently on Slack:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Just landed via X:

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Just landed via Reddit:

When younger I would walk up to the counter and the bartender would know me by name. Now it’s my pharmacist.

Reported on Snapchat:

Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

6 months ago

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When I say "long story short," what I really mean is "grab some popcorn, get cozy, and let me unleash the extended director's cut version of this tale." 🎬✨ Who needs bonus features when you've got my storytelling skills on full display?😄

bonus, bonus features, brevity, communication, features, humor, i, irony, punchline, say, short, story, storytelling, tell

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

32 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

My toxic trait is optimism.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

Making waves on Facebook:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

Shared recently on Facebook:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Why is there so much day left at the end of my patience?

Just shared via Snapchat:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I’m getting targeted ads about chin fat and I’m offended by the relevance.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

About to watch Tenet for the first time and I enjoyed it.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Reported on WhatsApp:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

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