Trendy Funny Quotes

  • One of the great things about being a dad is how easy it is to launder my own desire for ice cream through my children.
  • Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.
  • If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.
  • There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.
  • Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.
  • I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.