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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

I woke up alive again.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Maybe this is the Windows software update that changes everything for me.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Sex is so embarrassing. Like, why did I want to do that to you?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

First date idea: you rescue me out of the tree I got stuck in while looking through your windows.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2460 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,622

Funny Quotes Topics

15,295

Funny Quotes Images

12,622

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Going viral on X:

Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.

Broadcasted on Slack:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

Reported on YouTube:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

Breaking via Reddit:

Somethіng wrong іn your lіfe? There’s a nap for that.

Just shared via TikTok:

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I hate apps that shut off your music when you open them, like how fu*king important do you think you are?

Just landed via Instagram:

When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”
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Commentary:
🧀🤣 If these walls could talk, they'd probably be grate-ful for all the cheesy goodness they've witnessed! Looks like this guy's relationship with cheese is no secret around here.🧀😂

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2460 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,622

Funny Quotes Topics

15,295

Funny Quotes Images

12,622

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,466

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

People never run off to join the circus anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Have kids so you can fully appreciate how well your dog listens.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Becoming a dad turned me into an environmentalist. All I do now is turn off lights and yell at people who waste energy.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

When you clean your room so well that the only trash left is you.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

I am not someone you have to host if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Making waves on Threads:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Life is too short, and death is too long.

Making waves on Twitch:

Not to brag, but I just stood up without making a sound. Don’t be jealous.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

Just shared via TikTok:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Making waves on Slack:

“Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight!” Okay, then explain bayonets to me.

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