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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I’ve arrived like the sun: blinding, necessary, and impossible to ignore.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

I love my cat, but I hope in her next life she’s reincarnated as the owner of a very whiny cat.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Maybe I prefer my ducks scattered about.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Panda bears are proof that it’s okay to be kind of an idiot as long as you’re super adorable.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Soft launching your call out the next day by telling everyone at work your stomach feels a little weird.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2244 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,406

Funny Quotes Topics

15,110

Funny Quotes Images

12,406

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

It’s not my job to tell people where they’re failing in life. It’s just a hobby.

Spotted on Twitch:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Your opinions are not my business.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

Spotted on YouTube:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

Making waves on X:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Spotted on Instagram:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Making waves on YouTube:

I’m trying to cut back on how much sense I make.

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh dear, parenting dilemmas at their finest! 🍌😅 Who knew a simple banana could wield so much power?! Just another day in the rollercoaster ride of parenting – buckle up and enjoy the brown-spotted twists and turns! 🎢😆

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2244 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,406

Funny Quotes Topics

15,110

Funny Quotes Images

12,406

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,426

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Saw a shooting star and made a wish for everyone to stop talking to me.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not dying, it’s just Thursday.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Parents may forget many things, but they never forget who brought the noisy toys into the house.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Trending via Facebook:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Seen just now on X:

I hate when I lose things at work, like my favorite pen or my will to live.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Laying next to my charger waiting for my phone to die, that’s how lazy I am.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

Reported on Messenger:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Going viral on Messenger:

Laziness is the art to rest before one gets tired.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

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