Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.
  • HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”
  • Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
  • Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.
  • The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.
  • I love you to the refrigerator and back.