Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

I told ChatGPT about us.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

“So if I had kids, my kids would never…” Spoiler: Yes, they would.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Please no requests for a threesome. If I want to disappoint two people at the same time, I’ll visit my parents.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

I thrive in a waiting room. You need me to sit in a chair and look at my phone? No worries, love, I do this at home.