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Looks like your eight-legged friend is really taking the term "joyride" to a whole new level! 🕷️🚘 Who knew that your car spider moonlights as a web designer? Hope you have some extra flies in the glove compartment for a quick snack while you wait for your little critter to finish their masterpiece! 🕸️🍴

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

1 month ago
actually, conspiracy, faked, humor, i, landing, Mars, moon, moon landing, proof, prove, space
Never quit, unless it’s too hard.

1 month ago
hard, humor, motivation, never, perseverance, quit, too
To everyone I offended this year: do better next year, so I don’t have to do it again.

2 months ago
again, apology, better, everyone, humor, i, improvement, next, offended, offense, sarcasm, year
And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

2 months ago
disappointment, expectation, getting, humor, me, money, rich, unexpectedly, week
Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

4 months ago
birthday, breakup, ex, humor, idea, love, loving, manipulation, manipulative, me, only, sarcasm, text, thank
Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

1 month ago
arrival, attitude, being, being late, came, humor, i, late, least, management, never, punctuality, serious, should, time, time management, work

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

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Online dating is stupid because scent is such an important factor of attraction.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

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I can’t wait for my mom to come to my new house so she can tell me how I organized the kitchen wrong.

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Reincarnation, in this economy?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Just landed via Telegram:

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

Trending via Discord:

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

Going viral on Twitch:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Just shared via X:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

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My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Never quit, unless it’s too hard.

To everyone I offended this year: do better next year, so I don’t have to do it again.

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Pesto is just an Italian word that means “produced by pounding”, so in a way we are all pesto.

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Migraine so bad you develop powers like superhuman hearing.

I avoid those club cameras like my life depends on it.

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

I may not be the smartest or most athletic man in the world. There’s no second part to this, keep scrolling.

A long time ago, being crazy meant something. Nowadays, everybody is crazy.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

“And on the 7th day he rested”. Obviously God had not yet created laundry at that point.

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

Shark tooth necklaces are the perfect accessory if you want to look tough but also tell the world, “I’ve been to a gift shop.”

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My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Never quit, unless it’s too hard.

To everyone I offended this year: do better next year, so I don’t have to do it again.

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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