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Commentary:
"Who needs regular milk baths when you can spice things up with Cinnamon Toast Crunch? 🥛🛁🌟 Step aside, spa treatments, this breakfast concoction is the real MVP! Doctor's orders never sounded so delicious! 😄🥣"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Life is too short, and death is too long.

1 month ago

contemplation, death, existential, humor, irony, life, short, too
Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

2 months ago

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I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

1 month ago

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Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

2 months ago

am, boss, communication, excited, humor, i, know, let, texting, tomorrow, work, workplace
Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

4 months ago

another, daily, daily routine, day, God, gratitude, humor, routine, screen, screen time, technology, thank, thank you, time
Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

1 month ago

apologize, apology, comedy, critique, humor, job, nice, sarcasm, talent, too, workplace

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

I find that age is just a number, and the older you get, the number you get.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

The actors who signed on to that first Avatar movie have job security like no other in Hollywood.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

I don’t understand why it isn’t socially acceptable to choose to be nocturnal. The angry hot sky ball is gone, my internet is fast, everyone finally shut up, what’s not to like.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

Just shared via Twitch:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

Shared recently on Threads:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Going viral on Telegram:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

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Activity Log ✨

My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Life is too short, and death is too long.

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I’m off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

I lied. There’s no sex. Can you help me put this fitted sheet on my mattress?

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Do you remember when you looked through binoculars upside down and everyone was really far away? That was nice.

I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Stop dating if you have no car.

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

Americans saw water freeze at 0°C and said, “Let’s make that 32.”

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Folks, please have more respect for people with glasses. Because they pay money to see you.

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.

Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Someone at work had a 25-year anniversary, and it took everything in me not to say she’s been working longer than I’ve been alive.

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

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My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Life is too short, and death is too long.

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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