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Commentary:
"Who needs a therapist when you have a generous employer like that? 🤑 Say goodbye to those expensive coping mechanisms and hello to financial stability! 💸 #EmployerGoals"

afford, alcohol, caring, drug, employer, humor, i, pay, poorly, problem, salary, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

0

2 months ago

bad, comedy, emotional, emotional pain, fantasy, feelings, health, humor, insecurity, mental, mental health, pain, self-esteem
They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

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2 months ago

bed, constant, constant roll, funny idea, gas, gas station, hotdog, humor, idea, invention, over, roll, rolls, should, station, tanning, tanning bed
Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

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2 months ago

bible, bio, good, goodness, having, humor, morality, person, personality, satire, verse
I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

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2 months ago

bet, communication, email, feeling, finds, humor, i, inner, inner feeling, inside, screaming, silence, stress
Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

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2 months ago

amount, before, breakup, dating, evil, evil ex, ex, experience, humor, love, meet, need, normal, normal ex, offer, relationship, right, serious, situationship, spouse, three, truly
“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

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2 months ago

actually, AI, communication, comprehension, email, humor, i, intended, person, read, reading, said, sarcasm, summary, technology, thanks

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on WeChat this month:

If anyone has any experience with anything or knows anything about something, please let me know.

51 shares on Slack this month:

I want you to know that whatever problems you’re having, I’m hear to ‘like’ them.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

I love sleeping in fishnets. Makes you feel like a big honey roast ham.

65 shares on Telegram this month:

The more I insisted marshmallows were vegetables, the angrier my doctor got.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

10 shares on Threads this month:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

73 shares on Facebook this month:

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

15 shares on Reddit this month:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I have no use for mean people. I’ll walk right past you like you’re furniture.

Shared recently on Facebook:

A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

Just landed via Reddit:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My employer is totally caring. They pay so poorly that I can’t afford to have an alcohol or drug problem.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨