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Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive Sandwich-asana – a classic pose known for its perfect balance of carbs, proteins, and deliciousness! 🥪🧘‍♂️ Who needs downward dog when you can have downward deliciousness? 🤣 #SandwichPoseGoals"

activity, eat, favorite, food, humor, pose, sandwich, where, yoga

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Nicknamed my iPhone Lois Lane because it doesn’t recognize me without my glasses on either.

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2 months ago

glasses, humor, iPhone, lane, lois, Lois Lane, me, nickname, recognition, technology, vision
Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

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2 months ago

absurdity, art, cartoon, celebrity, celebrity culture, celebs, culture, forget, humor, media, monkey, pandemic, pictures, sell, social, social media, trying
I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

0

2 months ago

am, girlfriend, hot, i, know, people, relationship, street, walking, want
Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

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2 months ago

happiness, humor, Monday, mood, personal, sarcasm, struggle, vendetta, work
My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

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2 months ago

breakfast, craving, eating, food, humor, i, mood, moods, sandwich, wishing
I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

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2 months ago

am, ban, books, borrow, calling, humor, i, irony, library, lost, need, public, reading

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Facebook this month:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

67 shares on YouTube this month:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Your honor, when I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean in contempt.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

One of the great things about being a dad is how easy it is to launder my own desire for ice cream through my children.

16 shares on TikTok this month:

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

42 shares on Slack this month:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

60 shares on WeChat this month:

They should invent a second airport for people who have been in public before.

79 shares on X this month:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

Only in America can a kid wear $150 shoes, sip a $8 coffee, and post from a $1,200 phone about being oppressed and claiming capitalism has failed them.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

My guardian angel is probably preoccupied with sports betting apps and generative AI, that’s why she’s letting all these bad things happen to me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Imagine having a negative opinion of me, and I have no idea who you are.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Your dog immediately knows you’re leaving when you put on nice clothes… only because you usually look homeless when you’re at home.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Accidentally blurted out “skip intro” when my mother-in-law wasn’t getting to the point.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

I have two dogs: one dominates, the other is a subwoofer.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Spotted on YouTube:

The problem is that you are in the dating pool when the other fish are in the ocean.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Me: I have a cut under my fingernail. Universe: Excellent, I will send you an unusually high number of encounters with citrus fruit.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I drive safer when there’s food in my passenger’s seat than when there’s a person sitting there.

Just shared via WeChat:

I feel like waking up early on the weekend is so disrespectful.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

My wife rearranged the kitchen cabinets, and now I’ll never eat again.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I run a parody bank account.

Going viral on Messenger:

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Spotted on Instagram:

I’ve been having a rough day for about 5 years now.

Seen just now on Slack:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying works.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Nicknamed my iPhone Lois Lane because it doesn’t recognize me without my glasses on either.

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨