Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • “Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.
  • Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.
  • That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.
  • If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.
  • In my defense, I was left alone unsupervised.
  • I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.