Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Oh, the classic 'no idea' defense strategy – a stellar way to avoid small talk and awkward social interactions without coming off as completely clueless! 😏🤷‍♂️ Who knew being vague could be such a power move?💡"

answer, avoidance, conversation, humor, i, idea, interaction, just, know, mean, reluctance, social, social interaction, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

0

2 months ago

economy, egg, egg shell, humor, sarcasm, shell, stress, uncertainty, walking
Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

0

5 months ago

40s, age, aging, back, back pain, every, flare-up, health, humor, know, middle, middle age, never, pain, random, random pain, time, welcome
I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

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2 months ago

bar, candy, candy bar, diet, energy, energy bar, humor, i, irony, just, notice, pretend, snack
I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

0

2 months ago

asleep, baby, change, divorce, easily, fall, humor, i, irony, person, relationship, rest, sleep, used
Date idea: you hold my hand while I call the dentist and you tell me I’m so brave.

0

2 months ago

activity, brave, call, date, dentist, fun, fun activity, hand, hold, humor, i, idea, me, relationship, support, tell
It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

0

2 months ago

activity, again, awkward, awkward situation, cancelled, date, funny activity, holiday, holiday tradition, humor, i, random, restaurant, significant, significant other, situation, tell, time, tradition, where, women, year

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I am very depressed and in a really bad mood. Perhaps it will get better if I sit inside on a beautiful day and dwell compulsively.

93 shares on X this month:

I’m so introverted, I only listen to house music.

69 shares on Reddit this month:

OnlyFans, but it’s elderly women teaching you how to sew, knit, can food, quilt, and some solid recipes. OnlyGrans.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

People are always saying “not today, Satan” but what if we just hear him out.

38 shares on Slack this month:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

46 shares on Threads this month:

My husband saw a rabbit in our yard eating grass and said “That would be like sitting in a field of french fries.”

47 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep.

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

71 shares on Instagram this month:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

The funniest thing about Batman is that he legitimately doesn’t give a shit about crime that happens during the day.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

This is actually worse than Biff Tennan’s future.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after a vacation.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I wish it was socially acceptable to DM someone, “Hey, why did you and your partner break up?”

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re doing cardio.

Trending via Instagram:

Porn looks so funny when you’re not horny.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Spotted on Telegram:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Trending via Telegram:

I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.

Just landed via X:

Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

Making waves on Telegram:

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, Eat cake.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I like my job, but if I had the opportunity to become a rich housewife, I would take it.

Breaking via Facebook:

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

Live now on TikTok:

Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Date idea: you hold my hand while I call the dentist and you tell me I’m so brave.

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨