Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!
  • If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.
  • Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.
  • The only thing I gained this year is weight.
  • I don’t mean to say that I drink a lot of coffee, but Colombian farmers have a photo of me in their wallets.
  • If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.