Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Living the dream? More like living a nightmare! 😂💭 Who dreams of chaos and madness, am I right? This is the stuff of a comedy movie gone wrong! 🤪 #RealityCheck"

assurance, disappointment, dream, expectation, here, humor, i, just, life, living, me, never, reality, right, sarcasm, shit, somebody, told

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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42 shares on Slack this month:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

71 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

On a first date, saying “agree to disagree” every time they share anything about themselves.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

You’d seriously think I was wanted for murder by the way I react when someone knocks on the door.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Going “Omgg, that’s crazy,” every time my coworkers talk until it’s time to go home.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

“Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

It’s not my job to tell people where they’re failing in life. It’s just a hobby.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

One downside of marrying a doctor is you have to give up eating apples.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’ve got the nativity scene facing the TV, so baby Jesus can watch “Die Hard.”

Broadcasted on X:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Zoom is really only for one thing: realizing our dream of staring at ourselves while talking to other people.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Self-help books are brain rot. Return to fiction.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

They should remove the sex scenes from movies and then put them all into one big super sex scene movie they can show in theaters at the end of the year.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Straighten your back and drink some water, you dehydrated banana.

Spotted on YouTube:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Broadcasted on Slack:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

Going bananas on Threads:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

You’re not really a writer unless you send at least one email a month with a script attachment, saying, “Sorry, read this one instead.”

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Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

You’re not really a writer unless you send at least one email a month with a script attachment, saying, “Sorry, read this one instead.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨