Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

“I saw your ex!” A very unnecessary piece of information.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Of course there’s birth control for men. It’s called the way they act.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.