Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.
  • My hair would never allow me to commit a crime. I really do leave my DNA everywhere.
  • First date idea: I lean in close and surprise you with a wet willy.
  • There are people who leave comments on porn videos.
  • People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.
  • Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.